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Positive Self Talk for Children When They are Angry

Positive self-talk is crucial for children (and adults) for several reasons:


Builds Self-Confidence: Positive self-talk helps children develop confidence in their abilities and strengths. When children affirm themselves positively, they are more likely to believe in their capabilities and face challenges with resilience.


Promotes Emotional Well-Being: Positive self-talk contributes to emotional well-being by reducing stress, anxiety, and feelings of inadequacy. By reframing negative thoughts into positive ones, children can better cope with difficult situations and maintain a more optimistic outlook on life.


Fosters a Growth Mindset: Positive self-talk encourages a growth mindset, where children believe that their abilities and intelligence can be developed through effort and perseverance. By reinforcing positive beliefs about their potential, children are more motivated to learn, grow, and overcome obstacles.


Improves Problem-Solving Skills: When children engage in positive self-talk, they are more likely to approach challenges with a constructive mindset. Instead of becoming overwhelmed by setbacks or failures, they can focus on finding solutions and learning from their experiences.


Strengthens Self-Compassion: Positive self-talk promotes self-compassion, allowing children to treat themselves with kindness and understanding, especially during times of difficulty or disappointment. By offering themselves encouragement and support, children develop a healthier relationship with themselves and others.


On the other hand, negative self-talk, such as saying things like "I can't do it" or "I'm not good enough," can lead to feelings of frustration, helplessness, and anger. It can also reinforce limiting beliefs and hinder children's ability to reach their full potential.

Encouraging positive self-talk in children involves teaching them to recognize and challenge negative thoughts, replace them with affirming statements, and cultivate a mindset of self-compassion and resilience. By promoting a positive internal dialogue, parents, teachers, and caregivers can empower children to navigate life's challenges with confidence and optimism.


Here are some great prompts to use when teaching this skill. Write them down on a piece of paper, or the board, and have them circle the positive self talk examples in green, and the negative examples in red. Afterwards, you can discuss alternatives to the negative ones, and about how they don't encourage a solution.


  • "He makes me so mad I should hit him!"

  • "I don't need to prove myself in this situation"

  • "It's terrible everything is ruined!"

  • "It's okay to be frustrated, but getting angry isn't going to fix anything."

  • "As long as I stay calm, I am in control."

  • "I can't let them get away with this, they must pay!"

  • "What other people think doesn't have to matter so much."

  • "I don't want to do or say something I will regret, let me try to calm down."

  • "I should go tell on them, so they get in trouble!"

  • "They're just trying to make me mad! It's not going to work!"

  • "Just let it go, it's no big deal."

  • "I am in control of my emotions, and I choose peace."

  • "The last time this happened I got in trouble, let me try something different."





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